April is Alcohol Responsibility Month as well as Stress Awareness Month and I don’t think that’s a coincidence. As a licensed mental health therapist, I help support parents and children discover and implement adaptive coping strategies to manage and alleviate stress, and although drinking alcohol to relieve, numb, or avoid stress might sound like a good short-term escape, it isn’t the most effective or healthy coping strategy in the long-run. In the long run, it can make your short term problem worse, and make your stress and anxiety bigger. By drinking solely to alleviate stress, you compromise yourself for short-term relief and develop a relationship that can cause long-term problems. In this blog, I want to help support your mental health and your child’s as they grow. Being proactive and setting them up for success at an early age is preventative for risk factors later on in their life. And I also want us to rethink the “Drink to Cope” culture for our stress relief, so I truly hope my tips help you.
I recently spent 3 days in Washington D.C. doing the most meaningful work meeting with California Senators and Congress Representatives lobbying (influencing government decisions, policies, or actions) to eliminate drunk driving, underage drinking, and encouraging a lifetime of responsible drinking. The work I’m doing with Responsibility.Org is changing lives and making an impact with legislation to make big things happen and I couldn’t be prouder to partner with them. Last week was our annual parenting summit and I was so excited to reunite with the team and the organization. They are like family and we had the best time connecting and learning, and making a big difference in this world!
One of the speakers we heard at the summit was Jessica Lahey, author of Gift of Failure and Addiction Inoculation. She expressed that kids aren’t drinking alcohol because of peer pressure, but because of anxiety and stress, and I couldn’t agree more. So not only says it is imperative that we as parents role model healthy and responsible drinking habits, but also role model healthy coping strategies for stress relief, our overall wellness, and our mental health.
I am all about micro-mindfulness practices that I can easily sprinkle into my day. I have learned various ways over the years to take a moment here and there to rejuvenate and recharge rather than wait for a big chunk of time out of my day to relax. I am also a big believer in proactive, preventative care for ourselves rather than wait until we reach the point of burnout and be reactive to our stress. When your stress levels are high, you may not need a drink, you may just need a break.
So here are some quick and easy ways to help your daily regulation process to manage your stress:
Movement Medicine
One of the best ways I have found to alleviate stress is through walking, running, or exercising in some way. That might look like a hike, a dance class, pickleball, yoga, or whatever active movement you fancy. Sometimes my kids put on movement videos on YouTube and we playfully do them together. Sometimes we all take a walk in the neighborhood or even turn it into a nature scavenger hunt where we find and collect little treasures like rocks, leaves, and flowers while we walk. Instead of grabbing an alcoholic beverage, which may make your stress compounded, walk first, then decide if you want to drink afterwards. Chances are, your stress levels will go down after a walk, and you might want to save a cocktail for a different night for a different reason.
Take a Break
Give yourself grace and permission to take a break. Walk into another room or outside for a moment and take a few deep belly breaths while lifting your arms over your head and stretching. The fresh air, sunlight, and change of environment along with these calming movements should help calm you down quickly.
Stimulate your Sensory Receptors
Splash some cool water on your face, dab your face with a cold washcloth or wet wipe, or use a cool face roller. You can also rinse your hands under cold water. Other ways to stimulate your sensory receptors are brushing your hair, putting lotion on your hands, or giving yourself an arm, leg, or back scratch. You can also slowly drink some cold water or have a mindfully eat a small piece of chocolate. I keep a special sensory stash of chocolate just for myself in the pantry out of reach from my children for just these emergency occasions.
Deep Breathing
Deep breathing is the quickest and easiest calming method to use because can do it anywhere at any time and no one will know you are doing it except for you. Start by slowly breathing in through your nose, hold for five seconds, and then slowly breathe out through your mouth for five seconds. Repeat these steps until you feel calm and back to baseline. There are many different breathing techniques out there, so use the one that works best for you.
Mindfulness Body Scan
Put on some soft calming music. Start at your top of your head and pause to mindfully notice each part of your body all the way down to your feet. Stay as present as you can without getting distracted.
Shoulder Tapping
This is one of my favorite somatic therapy calming exercises to regulate stress. You begin by placing your right hand on your left shoulder and your left hand on your right shoulder. Then alternate tapping gently one hand at a time on each shoulder in a consistent and rhythmic pattern. This bilateral stimulation exercise has been practiced for a long time to help soothe the body and is very effective.
Wellness Winks
My favorite way to pause in my own life is to set a timer on my phone that goes off periodically throughout the day. I have an alert mid-morning and late afternoon (right before the witching hour and the final stretch of the evening hustle). I call these alert reminders “Wellness Winks.” During these wellness winks, I ask myself a few questions like: When is the last time I ate food or drank water? When is the last time I went to the bathroom? Have I been outside yet today? Have I moved my body or exercised today? Do I need to ask for help or delegate a responsibility? Once I check in with myself, and answer these quick questions, I can proactively meet my physical and mental needs. Sometimes we get so busy throughout the day, we forget to do simple things like go to the bathroom or drink liquids (other than coffee and energy drinks). And as the day goes on, our mental load gets louder and heavier, so try a wellness wink and see if it helps you regulate.
Journaling or Diary Dump
Journaling doesn’t have to take a long time. Just write long enough to dump your stressors so they are externalized from inside your mind and onto the paper. What you write doesn’t even have to be in full sentences or spelled correctly. You can simply write bullet points of what is stressful or do the opposite and just write out a few things you are grateful for in your life.
To learn more about the work Responsibility.Org is doing as well as gain a plethora or resources and conversation starters around alcohol responsibility, please visit their website here!
And here are some tips on how to drink responsibly, if you choose to drink alcohol.
- Educate yourself and learn how alcohol, and other factors, affect your blood alcohol content (BAC) by using this Virtual Bar.
- Designate a driver or plan for a safe ride home.
- Eat before and during events and alternate alcohol beverages with water or alcohol-free drinks.
- Know what is in your drink and what a “standard drink” is – this might surprise you!
- If you choose not to drink, don’t let others pressure you into changing your decision.
#ResponsibilityLooksGreat #ARM2025 #teamresponsibility
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