Let’s Talk About: Adjustment Disorders + Top 5 Moving Tips

Moving is a way of life. It is so commonplace to move that most the time we don’t think much of it. Moving can be difficult at any age but how does moving specifically affect children? Fortunately, children are typically very resilient but that doesn’t mean there isn’t an adjustment period or even some symptoms that become present during the first few months of a stressor like moving.

I always suggest to parents to prepare their children as much as possible in advance of any major change or stressor in life. Whether it’s a new baby, a move, or a divorce, children should be part of the process instead of being hidden from it. Timing does come into play though. If you prepare a child too far in advance, they may show signs of excessive anxiety because of the anticipation leading up to the stressor – good or bad. Listen to your gut. You’ll know when to inform them, teach them, and prepare them. I just wouldn’t want you to spring it on them at the last minute. And don’t think they are too young to understand what is going on. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Chances are they have been feeding off of your stress and anxiety about the change as well and already know something feels different before you even tell them. And don’t think they are too old to need extra coddling during a time of stress and change. Even adolescents and young adults need special love from a parent during times like these.

During a move, most children will show signs of depression and or anxiety. They may be more irritable or cry more than usual. They may not have an appetite to eat. They may not be able to sleep alone in their room. They may even tell you they have a stomach ache. They may even suffer at school with their grades or social relationships.

One of the best things you can do for your child is not to shame them or lose your temper with them. You may be frustrated at these clingy and or disturbing symptoms but comforting and nurturing them is the best medicine! Make them feel safe and secure and these symptoms will disappear quicker than if you are intolerant of them.

Other things you can do to help when moving to a new home is:

1. Unpack and put together their room first. Make sure they have as much normalcy as possible even if the rest of the house is chaotic. The sooner their room is done, the quicker they will acclimate to their new surroundings.
2. Get them something special for their new room! In our case, we picked out a new Lorena Canals rug to put in our daughter’s room to make her feel better about being in a new environment. We had her pick out the one that she wanted and even had her part of the decorating process when it arrived in the mail. We picked out the Hippy Soft Pink rug to match her room decor but it also comes in yellow, green, and blue! I love that the rug is handmade and is ego friendly made of 100% cotton and non-toxic dyes. And the best part is that it is machine washable! It is super soft and very comfortable to sit and play on – which we have done often since it’s arrival! Our daughter loves it and not only is it beautiful, it has helped her fall in love with her new room and our new house. You can also get FREE SHIPPING on all orders over $75!
3. Create a scavenger hunt around your new house. This fun game will get your child familiar with their new environment. You can have them find items inside the house, outside the house, and even include the local playground, fire station, and more!
4. Put stars on the ceiling of their new room. You can go to Amazon and order some glow in the dark stars to put on their ceiling with them. They will have fun decorating and this will also help them sleep better at night in their new room!
5. Create a play space just for them. This can be inside or outside the house. As a play therapist, I know how important play is to uncover and heal emotions so having a dedicated play space and dedicated play time will help alleviate negative symptoms from the move.

If your child’s emotional or behavioral symptoms become severe within the first 3 months of the stressor and lasts no longer than 6 months after the stressor and they have significant impairment at home or at school, they may have a diagnosable Adjustment Disorder. There are some other clinical guidelines before your child can be diagnosed so please see a local therapist to help you determine a treatment plan. You can find a therapist in your area by clicking here.