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How to Teach Children a Growth Mindset

As a parent, we constantly want to learn effective skills to help our children achieve their best potential. Have you ever heard your child say “I’m not good enough” or “I’m stupid” or “I can’t do it” to you before? It’s pretty common with children and adolescents of all ages, genders, developmental, and academic levels and you have the power to help them change their fixed mindset and turn it into a growth mindset. Having a growth mindset is achievable to teach and learn, and I am going to share with you how to do it, because as a child therapist, I know that if you change the language you use and the way you think, you can change the way you learn and live your life!

 

The Importance of a Growth Mindset

 

Teaching children to have a growth mindset is extremely important for their overall wellbeing. Having a growth mindset is way of thinking in a positive and forward direction. Teaching children to have a growth mindset creates a love for learning, a greater strength to try new and difficult things, and a sense of resilience when obstacles that come their way. We typically grow more when things are challenging, not when things are easy, so a growth mindset can teach your children to have persistence, determination, and confidence!

 

What is a Growth Mindset

 

It’s a philosophy about how to view life through a positive and fluid lens. Having a growth mindset is more about the process, not the outcome. A growth mindset is about the effort and the attitude of a task. And a challenge, mistake, or even a failed attempt at something isn’t looked at as the end and an excuse to give up, it helps a child embrace the temporary setback, and gives them a reason to try again harder or from a different angle the next time.

 

Examples of a Growth Mindset vs a Fixed Mindset

 

A child says. “I can’t do it”

A parent says, “I know it’s difficult, but you just haven’t figured it out yet.”

 

A child says, “I am stupid.”

A parent says, “You made a mistake on that math problem, but you can fix it the next time.”

 

A child says, “I did it, but…”

A parent says, “You did it, and…”

 

A child says, “I’m not good enough.”

A parent says, “I know you are disappointed and I can see you are upset. I know you can do it. Let’s take a break and try again tomorrow.”

 

A child says, “I’m not going to try because I don’t want to fail”

A parent says, “You will only fail when you stop trying.”

 

A child says, “I will read 2 books this week.”

A parent says, “I love your passion for reading. Let’s read more tomorrow than we did yesterday and see how many books we can read.”

 

A child says, “I want to get all A’s this year.”

A parent says, “That is a great goal. I want you to try your best and enjoy what you learn.”

 

A child says, “I am not good at ______”

A parent says. “It will get easier when you practice!”

 

Questions To Ask your Children

 

What is something easy you can do?

What is something hard for you or something that takes a lot of hard work?

What is something that you need more practice on?

What is something new you’d like to try?

Three things that make me awesome are…

 

Growth Mindset Mantras and Affirmations

 

I am going to try my best today

I am going to have a good day

I am going to learn something new today

If I make a mistake, I will keep going

If I fail, I will try again

If I need a break, I will ask for one

I will make good choices today

If I make a poor choice, I will make a better one next time

I will learn from my mistakes

I am capable of achieving my dreams

If something is difficult, I won’t quit

I will work hard today

I am open to learning something new

I have a positive attitude

I will try anything at least once

All I need to do is try

I will handle any challenge that comes my way

I haven’t done it yet, but I will

I am proud of myself for giving it my all

I will be the best I can be today!

I can do it!

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Hello! I am Dr. Kim and I am The Parentologist! I am first and foremost a wife and a mom. I am also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Registered Play Therapist. I hope through my professional and personal experience we can collaborate with each other on how to better ourselves and our relationships with our families and our children.

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TODAY.com Parenting Team Parenting Contributor

About Dr. Kim

Hello! I am Dr. Kim and I am The Parentologist! I am first and foremost a wife and a mom. I am also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Registered Play Therapist. I hope through my professional and personal experience we can collaborate with each other on how to better ourselves and our relationships with our families and our children. Read More…

My Instagram

🇺🇸 What a monumental day in history we had t 🇺🇸 What a monumental day in history we had today! 🇺🇸

As soon as we woke up I started educating my children, specifically my daughter, on what the inauguration meant and why today was such a special day in history. We both were glued to the television as we watched @kamalaharris be sworn in as the first Black South Asian woman Vice President and @joebiden be sworn in as the 46th President of the United States. We also were powerfully moved hearing @amandascgorman - the youngest inaugural poet in history recite “The Hill We Climb.” 

My daughter was so excited to participate and recite the Pledge of Allegiance with the rest of the county and she was so proud to see and be a part of history in the making. I haven’t been to Washington D.C. in about 8 years but I promised I would take her one day when the pandemic is over. 

In the meantime, I have a fun fact for you! Did you know that President Joe Biden and I both graduated from the same university? Yep! We both went to @syracuseu 🍊 And in fact, @joebiden is the first @syracuseu alumnus to become President of the United States! 

📸: @chrissywphoto #inauguration #inagurationday #inaguration2021 #joebiden #kamalaharris #presidentbiden #syracuseuniversity #syracuse #syracuseu #historyismade #madamvicepresident #mommyandme #46thpresident #sandiego #sandiegoblogger #momblogger #parentingblogger #motherhood
This time of year is notorious for dry air, allerg This time of year is notorious for dry air, allergies, and sinus trouble. #ad 

And since I work from home, it can get quite noisy and distracting with my husband and two children here, so sometimes I get my best work done in the comfort of my own bed. And the best part is that I can have my new @crane_usa “4 in 1” cool mist humidifier on at all times with essential oils to help with overall wellness and since it comes with a sound machine I can block out the other noises in the house! 

And at night, it helps my sinuses as I sleep, especially when the dry air of the heater is on, and it has a nightlight so my kids can see where they are going in the middle of the night when they inevitably need water or a hug! 

This is our 6th #cranehumidifier style and it’s my favorite one yet! Check out my stories for a closer look! 👀 #happyhealthyhumidity 

#humidifier #coldandflu #humidifiers #peaceandquiet #workingfromhome #workingmom #working #coldandfluseason #coldandflurelief #winter #winterstyle #wintertime #wintervibes #winter2021 #wahm #wahmlife #wahmlifestyle #workfromhomemom #workfromhomelife #workfromhome #workathomemom #workathome #workathomelife #newmom #babyshowergift #sinusrelief
{New Blog Post} “How to Teach Children Gratitude {New Blog Post} “How to Teach Children Gratitude” 🌱✨🌸

Throwing it back to one of the first mommy and me photos I ever posted on my feed because I’ve been teaching my daughter about gratitude since she was this little, possibly even younger (she is two here for reference)! 

Gratitude is such an important virtue and must have trait to build a child’s character. It also shows therapeutic benefits when you show gratitude to others, so why wouldn’t you want to make it a priority to teach and instill in your children? 

In this blog, I have suggestions for how to teach children gratitude broken down by ages and stages from infancy to teenage years, while also including some conversation prompts, and links to my favorite gratitude journals for busy families that we use here at home! 

Find the direct link to read in my bio and stories! I also published similar articles on @todayparents and @redtricycle if you follow me there! #drkimblog
DOUBLE TAP if you agree!! 🙋🏼‍♀️ I am DOUBLE TAP if you agree!! 🙋🏼‍♀️

I am that mom who wants to do it all and when I get overwhelmed or start suffering from a major case of burnout, I feel guilty if I take a break instead of giving my body and mind permission to slow down or even stop. 

As moms we often feel guilty if we take a break or believe we are perceived as weak if we ask for help. I have learned that the more I ask for help and the more time I take for myself, the better I am for my children. 

Guilt is an emotional response to something you perceived you did wrong, but when you experience unnecessary guilt, it’s counterproductive to healing and helping you with what you need most. So give it a try and let me know how you are going to take a break and not feel guilty about it this week below in the comments! ⤵️ #drkimparentingtips #theparentologist #drkimparentingadvice
DOUBLE TAP if you used to love Hello Kitty when yo DOUBLE TAP if you used to love Hello Kitty when you were little - and still do! 🙋🏼‍♀️🐱#ad

I am so excited to have all of these new items from the @erincondren Hello Kitty collection that launched today to keep work fun, playful, and reminiscent of childhood - something all adults need a little more of, am I right? 

The collection is all about organization, kindness, and friendship. My favorite piece of the collection is the “Daily Kindness and Joy Journal” that boldly says BE KIND, BE NICE, REPEAT on the front cover but I am also pretty obsessed with the Hello Kitty x Erin Condren Pencil Case and Vegan Leather Padfolio! 

Swipe to see my business attire on top and activewear on the bottom work style! 😉 And head to my stories to see it all up close and for your convenience I have everything linked for you http://liketk.it/35XZC and make sure to follow me at THEPARENTOLOGIST @liketoknow.it  for more of my favorites!!! #liketkit #erincondren
{New Blog Post} “Sensory Play, Pretend Play, and {New Blog Post} “Sensory Play, Pretend Play, and Role Play Ideas for Children with Autism” 🧩 🧸 🚂 ⚽️ 
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For the last 3 years I have spent my career therapeutically helping families and children of all ages on the Autism Spectrum. Play has been a fundamental way for many of my clients to communicate if they are non-verbal. And some of my clients have had to be taught how to play with a toy or another person. The play ideas listed on the blog can be used with children with or without special needs. Play is a universal way a child can explore their world in a way that makes sense to them and cultivate imagination, creativity, and fun! As a Registered Play Therapist, I love the work I do and couldn’t be prouder of the progress my clients have made with play over the years! #drkimblog
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#autism #autismmom #autismfamily #autismspectrum #autismcommunity #autismparent #autismlife #autismparents #autismparenting #autistickids #autisticchildren #autistictoddler #autismresources #playtherapy #playtherapist #playbasedlearning #learningthroughplay #activitiesforkids #activitiesfortoddlers #activitiesforchildren #sensoryplay #sensoryplayideas #sensoryprocessingdisorder #sensoryactivities #momswhoblog #ontheblog #newblogpost #parentingblogger #momblogger
{New Blog Post} ✨🌱🧴“Ways to Take Control {New Blog Post} ✨🌱🧴“Ways to Take Control of Your Eczema” #ad 
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These winter months have been so dry and my eczema has been flaring up. Can anyone relate? For decades I have used a variety of treatment options from over-the-counter ointments and lotions to doctor prescribed steroid medication. In today’s blog, I am partnering with @mediqcme to share more of my story and struggles with atopic dermatitis as well as some new treatment options! If you or a loved one suffer from eczema or atopic dermatitis it’s a must read! 
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Plus there is a survey at the end of the blog you can fill out and opt in to be entered to win 1 of 10 VISA gift cards! 🙌🏻 Link in bio and in stories! #itchyskinhelp #drkimblog
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#eczema #eczemarelief #eczemahealing #eczematreatment #eczemaproblems #eczemawarrior #atopicdermatitis #itchyskin #itchyskinrelief #atopicskin #atopicdermatitistreatment #atopicdermatitismanagement #eczemamanagement #winterskincare #winterskin #winterskincareroutine #winterskincaretips #newblogpost #momswhoblog #ontheblog #wellnessblogger #wellnesstips #wellnessexpert
{New Blog Post} 🌿 “How to Utilize Play to Get {New Blog Post} 🌿 “How to Utilize Play to Get Your Kids to Do What You Want” 
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As a Registered Play Therapist, play is the foundation to the way I help children conceptualize and conquer the world. Play is second nature to children and the way they respond to many of life’s obstacles. Sometimes as parents, it is easy to get into a power match with your children, especially when you want your children to comply with a request and they won’t budge. When this happens, we need to change the way our adult mind thinks and switch it to the way a child thinks. Instead of giving them a punitive consequence, try these play recommendations that can be used with children as young as toddlerhood all the way to adolescents! #drkimblog 
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#playtherapy #playtherapist #therapistsofinstagram #playoutsidethebox #learningthruplay #playbasedlearning #learningthroughplay #learningisfun #parenting #parentingtips #parenting101 #parentingteens #parentingtweens #parentingtoddlers #parentingadvice #parentingexpert #parentingblogger #parentingblog #newblogpost #ontheblog #momswhoblog #parenthood #toddlerproblems #toddlermom #behaviortherapist #behaviortherapy #positiveparentingsolutions #positiveparentingtips #positiveparenting
{New Blog Post} “Tips on How To Set Goals Effect {New Blog Post} “Tips on How To Set Goals Effectively in 2021” ✨ 
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It’s is usually around this time that I start thinking of the goals I want to accomplish for the year. And whether you believe in making resolutions, affirmations, or goals, it is time to be proactive!! On the blog, I outlined an organizational system I use year after year to help me accomplish my goals. And I hope they work for you!! 
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What are some of your goals you want to accomplish this year? 
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#2021 #2021goals #goals #goalsetting #goalgetter #goalsettingtips #goalsetter #goalsetting2021 #goalcrusher #momhustle #snowday #snowman #newgoals #newgoals2021 #mommyandme #letthembelittle #letthembekids #letthemplay #playoutside #playoutdoors #playoutsidethebox #familyday #familyfun #familysnowday
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